Earworm

The songs that seem to come out of nowhere... and get stuck in your head....

This is one that's my most recent earworm


RUBBER RING
by The Smiths


A sad fact widely known
The most impassionate song
To a lonely soul
Is so easily outgrown
But dont forget the songs
That made you smile
And the songs that made you cry
When you lay in awe
On the bedroom floor
And said : oh, oh, smother me mother...
No ...
Rubber ring, rubber ring, rubber ring, rubber ring
La ...

The passing of time
And all of its crimes
Is making me sad again
The passing of time
And all of its sickening crimes
Is making me sad again
But dont forget the songs
That made you cry
And the songs that saved your life
Yes, youre older now
And youre a clever swine
But they were the only ones who ever stood by you

The passing of time leaves empty lives
Waiting to be filled (the passing ...)
The passing of time
Leaves empty lives
Waiting to be filled
Im here with the cause
Im holding the torch
In the corner of your room
Can you hear me ?
And when youre dancing and laughing
And finally living
Hear my voice in your head
And think of me kindly
No ...
Rubber ring, rubber ring, rubber ring, rubber ring
La ...
No ...
Rubber ring, rubber ring, rubber ring, rubber ring

Do you
Love me like you used to ?
Oh ...
Rubber ring, rubber ring, rubber ring, rubber ring
La ...

Youre clever
Everybodys clever nowadays
Youre clever
Everybodys clever nowadays

You are sleeping
You do not want to believe
You are sleeping
You do not want to believe
You are sleeping
You do not want to believe
You are sleeping

Another "Notes to Self"

I'm back in Midland, but I've spent the last few weeks in Austin, "feeling it out"... but not ready to make a commitment to moving... I guess I was waiting for my pumpkin to be turned into a carriage or something.... but then, it was brought to my attention..... and I realized: I have to decide.... make a decision even if it's scary and there is no fairy godmother involved.....

So, I found a place, in Austin.... In the neighborhood I like.... its a SMALL studio apartment.... (400 sq ft).... but you know what? I don't need "stuff".... there's NO safety in objects... Or ideas, plans or people... so I think this will be a good thing for me..

i'm back in Midland now.... with my pups.. and family....

My B-day is on Lundi Gras this year.... so, my parents used their airline credits and (AWWWWW YEAH) I'm headed down to NOLA for Carnival time! It'll be good.... I haven't seen my friends there in years.... and Mardi Gras is my favorite holiday.... i just don't know what I should be (costume-wise)..... We'll see.... I'm excited to go there!

Soooo... Since it's late and I'm tired...

I thought I'd do another "notes to self" segment..... (the random notes I write myself on my phone.... but I usually forget I wrote):

50
Arachnidiot: A person who accidentally wanders into an "invisible" spider web and begins gyrating and flailing about wildly.

(yes I've done that.... and seen others do it too.... I copied this down from the Galaxy Cafe)

Hawaii
(seen in Kauai)

Mele Kalikimaka

"Drifted objects tumbled pieces of life, only the strongest reach the shore to be found and transformed, abstract representations of life lived." (quote from an artist at Little Tsunami Tattoo)

I Need

Someone to tell me to "go to bed" at a decent hour.... Being a night person has its darkside, especially when you're trying to live on the light side. Some hate the moon.... I tend to lean towards the side that hates the sun...f mornings!!!

Is it possible?
If i sleep in my scarf, could I accidentally strangle myself in my sleep?

Love:
I'm in love:
With what love gives
and what it takes.
Giving myself love,
Giving to love...
In the end:
It all goes back to love....
We all return to love.....

Nothing:
I don't have anything earth-shattering to say;
Nothing amazing to say...
I just have my thoughts,
my voice,
my one voice in the sea of billions,
my one voice in the history of trillions
of life stories.....
past, present, future...

One More
One more cigarette.
One more time.
One more minute.
One more chance to say what I wanted to.....
What I meant to.
Just one more.
.... and then another one.

What?!
Huh?
What?
Huh?
What?
Sorry, I don't hear well....
....{these are} conversations i have.....

25 things

call me lazy.... or whatever.... but i feel like i should blog... because i haven't lately.... and i posted this on face book... so I thought I'd post it here too..


25 Random Things


1. I'm addicted to Soy Chai Lattes (not a cheap addiction)

2. When the Starbucks employees started to greet me with, "Hi Ryann, Soy Chai?" I decided to start going to another Starbucks... I was not comfortable knowing they had caught on to my addiction.

3. I like to make stuff... like art stuff... I also break stuff.. but dont really like breaking stuff...

4. I carry around a big purse... and it's usually filled with rocks, and other random things I find on the ground... sometimes my purse full of rocks is super heavy...

5. My middle name is Suzanne, but not pronounced like you'd think... it's pronounced the Louisiana way.. the French way... and it bugs me when people argue that with me...

6. I have the largest key ring ever, and I can still not find my keys... ever!

7. I like painting birds and insects.... and I like the symbolism and mythology behind them, and how beautiful they are... but I don't want to touch a bird or an insect.... ewwww... so, i'm not really the "bird" person people think I am....

8. i know the lyrics to Warren G "Regulators" .... and have NO problem showing off and rapping it when ever... sometimes even out of the blue.

9. I don't know where I'm "from".... I moved my whole life... and obviously continue to..

10. my parents are from Louisiana (NOLA and BR), but I was born in Stavanger, Norway.

11. born in norway, then moved to Jakarta, and then moved to Medan (both Indonesia), then to Connecticut, then to Bakersfield, CA, then back to Stavanger, norway... then to Houston, Then to Midland (my senior year of highschool), then to Austin, then to Louisiana, Then back to houston, then to Dallas, now i'm floating... between Midland and Austin... about to move back to Austin.

12. I blog: http://ryannontheroad.blogspot.com

13. I need to update my web site but I have one: www.ryannrathbone.com

14. Sometimes I talk, and it makes a lot of sense in my own head... but doesn't make sense coming out of my mouth.

15. I hate talking on the phone

16. i love my family and friends... I have the greatest family and friends... who've helped me soooo much, especially since Carter's death.

17. I love driving on long road trips... even by myself... actually, especially by myself.

18. My favorite words to say are: giggle, and zombies!

19. I've taken my LSAT and my GRE... but have yet to really go to law school or grad school

20. I'm TERRIBLE at math! on my GRE only %5 of people scored below me on the math part (compared to %90 on the verbal and writing parts)... but in college I ROCKED statistics... I have no idea how... but statistics clicked... but simple math, and algebra and the rest just scramble my brain.

21. I have a doggie named Dylan, who is 9 and who I always thought was a weimaraner until I met a "blue lacy" which is the state dog of texas... now I'm not so sure he's a full weimaraner.... I feel like he's lied to me the last 9 years.... maybe i should return him for a REAL weimaraner.... (okay... TOTALLY kidding about the returning him part.)

22. I leave a trail of stuff behind me and don't even realize it...

23. My favorite number ever is 23

24. the last year and a half, I've only worn 3 pair of shoes... uggs, crocks and birkenstocks... all three brands that i always SWORE i'd never wear.

25. I'm obsessed with fake mustaches!

Gathering information

Yesterday, I looked at studio space here in Austin...

I loved it! The web site is pumpproject.org

My friend Anne's husband is a very talented jewelry designer, and he rents space there. His web site is limbojewelry.com,

I also met an artist who does mixed media. This is his website's link jhaleyarts.com .... Since I also like to use found objects, mixed media and found surfaces, I talked to him for a while... I really like his work... and processes... it was great to talk to him, and find out how he was getting certain effects and different processes...

Everyone there was very nice.

So... that's an option...

I also talked to a friend of Steve Collins last night... she's working on a book right now... she gave me some great advice and is going to email me a book proposal form for me to use...

I talked to her about the Big Bend book... and then I told her about the other book I want to write... pretty much a raw look at my journal entries and my art and how they both evolved during my grieving process... She strongly suggested that I work on the art/grief book first...

I'd like to, but it still seems so raw... and sometimes like it's still unfinished because I'm still in the process, sometimes it seems so far away, and yet some of the emotions are still raw... but maybe she's right...

I also met up with Rev and talked to him about getting hooked up in the marketing loop here in Austin. It's doable... and he has his other company pictureperfecteventco.com which is a full service company for events... nationwide. I'm looking forward to working with him....

So, a lot to do... more to do... I'm still at the gathering information stage... all's great though... things seem to be coming together more and more...

Chillin' at the holiday inn.....

I've had a lot of dreams where a mattress played a big roll.... one time I flew out of a window on a mattress... another time I took a pic with my cell of a burning mattress to send to Kel.... So i looked up what dreaming of mattresses means....

"Mattress

To dream of a mattress, denotes that new duties and responsibilities will shortly be assumed."

Okay... so that maybe pretty accurate...

Cassie and I had a blast this weekend. It was so good to see her... We had a great time and laughed a lot! We always do... and she loves Austin so much, she's most probably likely to move here too! yay!

We also decided to tell everyone that we were gonna watch the "big basketball game" (the super bowl).... my dad thought I really didn't know that the Super Bowl wasn't basketball... I think he wanted to commit me... ha! but now he knows that it was a joke...

.... but we didn't watch it at all! We relaxed at the lakehouse, cass made dinner and her parents drove over to meet us and have dinner with us... I'll post more pics and stories later...

We spent two nights at the Intercontinental in Austin... and one night at the lakehouse.... then her flight was cancelled yesterday, because a woman on the plane had a panic attack and used 3 of the 5 oxygen tanks on the plane.... so she was put up at the Holiday Inn... "whatcha doin?" "Chillin' at the holiday innnnn...." Funny because we'd been singing that song all weekend!

So, now i'm in Austin, trying to get some networking done and getting the ball rolling on my move here...

So much to think about... so many options... I've gotta get them narrowed down....

okay... off to returning calls and emails... and every other form of communication via technology....

"Stop rhyming I mean it!" "anybody want a peanut?"

So, I've been in Midland this week... I haven't really felt like blogging.

But, I've gotten a lot done... not art-wise, but more catching-up-on-correspondence-and-stuff-wise.

I leave for Austin tomorrow morning, and will pick up Cas in the afternoon... I'm so excited!

I'll try my best to blog from Austin.

Then, after she leaves Monday, I'm going to start networking, looking for job opportunities, housing possibilities... all of the above.... I just want to make sure I don't just move and lose focus on my main goals.

I wanna make art, and I wanna write... and do that as my living... those are my goals...

So, with that said... I'm going to bed... but before that (and on a COMPLETELY different subject):

Did you know that nothing rhymes with orange?! nothing in the English language.... weird...

When I Googled that, just to make sure it was true, I came across an amazing web site: Flocabulary "Hip Hop in the Classroom"....

For Realz yo!

but there are other words that have nothing that rhyme with them too (as the link will show you):

silver, purple, month, ninth, pint, wolf, opus, dangerous, marathon and discombobulate.

Of course I spent hours trying to find rhymes for each of them... in my head... and, No, I don't consider that a waste of time...

Like, Purple.... I think "verbal" kinda rhymes...

My favorite alternative rhyming example that flocabulary gives is:

discombobulate - the disco they love to hate, Crisco ovulate, risky even on a date, Sisqo's rollerblades

"sisqo's rollerblades" ?!? what!??

but I DO love "the disco they love to hate" and (this one is GENIUS) "Crisco ovulate".....

...don't worry if it makes sense... just make it rhyme every time...

G'night.... pics and updates from this austin trip soon!

hello.... goodnight

My mind is going crazy.... I'm tired but cant sleep...

I hope I have everything together for Friday... I didn't paint today... I picked up my prints and bought some frames and worked to put some of the finishing touches on a few pieces... I still have more to do..

It's not that it's a big show... it's gonna be very laid back, just more of a preview and meet and greet... but, I'm trying to get so much done.... because after this weekend I start to look for a place to live and a job of some sort in Austin.

I also have my first solo show at the Magnolia Gallery in Dallas this summer! YAY!

so, I'd like to have some work finished for that show... because after I move (and I'm working and getting settled and adjusted and all of that fun stuff), I don't know where I'll be able to paint.... I'm thinking too far ahead.... Sometimes I've gotta just pull myself back into the present...

okay... back.

We have a new president!!! America just became a much cooler country!

Alright, goodnight!

Ahhhhh.... much better...

YAY!

i've finally gotten into the "flow" and I'm making stuff that I LIKE and finishing it! wow.... it's been a long time... or at least it feels like it's been a long time since I've done that...

Today, I put the encaustics, wax and collage stuff away, and broke out the acrylic paints.... good ol' trusty acrylics....

And i finished the chandelier:


(I think it looks better in real life than this pic... but that's just my opinion)

and, on the piece that I collaged the hexagon dress patterns, I decided I wanted a moth... (I've had a love for moths since this summer in North Carolina... I like them so much better than butterflies...)... not just any moth, but one of the silk worm moths... so using these "mothels" (okay... bad joke...).... I used these moths to model my moth after:


And this is what it looked like in process:


I still have more work to do.... I'm trying to keep it somewhat transparent... using very watered down paints... but I also want it to be bright... it could take a while:


Both pieces are about 24"x24"..... so i'm also glad that I have work that's larger than I usually do...

I also am high on the feeling of accomplishment (meaning: actually finishing a piece that I like).....

And i like both pieces.... and I like them enough to where I don't really care if I'm the only person in the world who likes them... (of course I want other people to like them), but they say what I want them to say... and mean something to me... and I like them... and that feels fantastic!



I watched the first American Idol tonight... I love that show!


Another show I love is the Daily Show... This episode (before "super tuesday" in 2000) is appropriate, for several reasons:

a. this is before Bush became President... and right now he's about to become a former President

b. This is about Midland (where I am now)

c. This is about Cooties... and unless you're vaccinated (circle circle dot dot)... you may be infected ... although boys are at a higher risk for cooties than girls are....

The Daily Show With Jon StewartM - Th 11p / 10c

Cootie Scandal

Barack Obama Interview
John McCain Interview

Sarah Palin Video
Funny Election Video

Saturday night

some ideas are worth listening to.

the story about changing the one thing on a painting that your most attached to.... yeah, that works... at least I feel like it did...

i felt so much more free, and wasn't thinking or judging everything once i tried that...

the chandelier painting now has a WAYS to go.... but looks like this:


I re-painted the background, and then painted a big chandelier.... I may make it more red... not sure... I used to have a red chandelier in my old house.... Now it's the focus and not an element that's in the way... At least I'm more happy with it...

and the one that I thought I was too attached to the background.... well, I think I was most attached to the tree that was on it.... so I took that tree off and replaced it with this one:


And then I tried something new.... (I got this idea from another artist at Penland), I painted the board blue, black and off-white and then took a sewing pattern and cut it in to hexagon shapes an pasted them on with Matte Medium:




I haven't touched the painting with the girl yet.... but I feel like I'm on a roll... Everything seems much more organic, and flow-like, rather than me trying to force everything to come together.... and that wasn't working. at all.

oh yeah....

Last night, I decided I wanted to take a well-deserved break, and watch Saturday Night Live... I was looking forward to vegging out in front of the TV for an hour... I NEVER watch TV... But, instead of some hit-or-miss funny SNL, there was a 3 hour telethon instead! NOOO! This is what I was staring at in disbelief instead of SNL:


so, not cool... To quote a friend: "That's UN-American, well, kinda."

I heard it wasn't all that funny last night anyways... maybe the telethon incident was more entertaining in the long run...

back to work....

Learning marketing, the cyber-savvy way

I thought I knew marketing... I thought I knew networking.... I thought I understood the online world of both.... Then, today, I met Damien Franco... His blog is www.yourphototips.com... and he totally schooled me!

I wish I'd had taken notes the whole time... I learned so much from him... from Flickr groups, to tags, to linking to someone's site so that they link back to yours... So much information that my head is still spinning! I was basically in awe, sitting there like, "teach me your ways, wise one." Thank you so much Damien! I'm looking forward to meeting up with him and his wife this weekend!

I'm tired or I'd have checked out some of the web sites he referred me to... and would write a lot more... but, (like I said) I'm tired... so I will later...

I did check out Blurb.com today... I'm gonna try to put a portfolio/book together... but my scans aren't ready yet... hopefully they'll be done tomorrow.

I did go to Hobby Lobby and buy some more stuff to collage with... even though it's really cool stuff, I kinda wanna kick myself for adding more options for me to use... I should just work with the stuff I already have... But the new stuff is SOOO cool! And on SALE!
I bought this bag of fall stuff, with leaves:


and Squirrels! SQUIRRELS!


The leaves may or may not go on that piece... the squirrels definitely won't ... I just wanted to check out all of the fun new crap I bought!

I also moved the moth and doily aside and tried this on the clover background:


And I bought WHITE india ink! I wanted to use it to brighten up that collage piece that has been fighting me.... and it worked... except for I accidentally put too much on the angel's face and erased it's features. I'll have to go back in and fix that:


A lot of just trial and error... and moving things around...

Oh! and I've had these gold frames for a while... (two of them) and in the same bag with the squirrels and leaves there were two trees.. Just an idea:


Okay... I'm really tired... going riding again tomorrow... and then I'm going to checkout all the websites and info I learned... Maybe I'll even start to use Flickr the right way!

new (to me) funny things...

I started to feel a bit less crazy later today... I worked on a few things... unfortunately nothing that I'm proud of yet... and nothing that I'd like to post online either...

I think I probably already have enough work together for the show at The Gypsy Wagon on Jan 23rd.... So, this week, I'll work on getting those things finished scanned and printed... Not as much about MAKING work... more about finishing the work that's so close to already being finished...

that takes a lot of pressure off of me almost instantly...

So with that said... here are a few of my new favorite things:



and then:

Resolutions

So, it's January... and 2009... I don't think either of those two things have registered to me yet. It feels like December, and I know if I had to write the date on anything I'd write 2008.

That was my "new year's resolution": to stop writing '08 and start writing '09. I guess that's not exactly aiming high...

...but I really do have some new year's resolutions:

I bought a 2009 weekly planner... I've been carrying it around in my purse, but have yet to open it or write in it. But, I think (just by osmosis maybe) I'm becoming a better planner already!

My new planner (If I choose to use it) will help with my other resolutions... like figuring out where to go next, where I'll move, planning art shows and finishing the book on Big Bend I'm working on with Justin Voight.

We had a wonderful New Year's at the lakehouse with family and friends... lot's of sing-a-longs.... everyone had a blast (I know I'm speaking for everyone... but I think it's true).



Later this week I'll be back in Midland and getting to work on making some more work and finishing the pieces I already have almost done...

I went to an art gallery the other day, and there were a few pieces there that reminded me of my work... I noticed that the artist used these boards that are like boxes... I forget what they're called... but some women in my encaustic class at Penland used them as well... if I start to paint on those, I wouldn't have to worry about presentation and framing... I need to go ahead and buy some; splurge a bit, instead of scavenging for wood scraps and stuff in friends' and family's garages...

Professional Grey fighter in a Box of Revlon "Soft Black"

I woke up really un-godly early... but early enough to see my sister off to school... my mom off to take her to school and then go to Bible study... and my dad go quail hunting..... I mean REAL early... like 7:15 or something similar; so early, it could be nighttime! :)

Kelly arrived back in Maine from Mumbai, India, safely, today. So so so thankful and glad for her safe trip.... I can't wait to see pics... I'm still jealous...

I'm on day 2 of my OH-CRAP-I'M-GOING-TO-HAWAII-IN-12-DAYS diet... yeah... not working so great... I HEART carbs... I mean, I could live on them... well... the first day of the diet is fruit only..... (i know... there are carbs in fruit.... but not the good/bad/fun kind!).... Zumba class was fun yesterday... what a crazy workout... like step aerobics...on raver drugs. My calves are super sore today... Tomorrow I have a riding lesson.... sore again!

Tomorrow, I also leave to go to Dallas... Art Conspiracy!!! I'm nervous... still... and stressed.... (like everytime I go to Dallas... except for more stressed).... but I keep reminding myself: IT'S FOR CHARITY.... but still... me, painting, on a time schedule, and painting in public?? Yikes! i'm like "The Little Hermit Painter".... but, I'm SO excited to paint with Jayme (like we used to!), and I'm so honored to be a part of Art con again this year.

Oh! Today, I noticed a forest of grey hair on my head... I knew I had some... maybe more than some.... but a forest?!? no....

After C died, my hair was falling out in the fist-full's ... When I went to a doctor, she told me that was not abnormal after experiencing severe shock and trauma.... but she told me, "don't worry, it'll grow back".... (like, i cared about my hair then....) ... but, she was right. It has grown back.... GREY! Or rather: white and wiry.....Either way, it's grown back, but not the same... I could use that as a metaphor for myself... but I'm too tired (and hungry) to go there.

So, I noticed a grey wiry forest, thriving on my scalp... and it made me do, what i've been threatening to do, to my do, for months:

BREAK OUT THE BOX O' HAIR DYE! and BLACK!

Yes. it's black... well... technically "soft black".... but not grey! YAY for NO grey!

I also freaked out about what I'm gonna paint on friday for Art Con.... have I mentioned that?!

just kidding... I know I did... a lot....

I also know it'll be great and fun, like last year! I hope to see as many peeps as possible there! xoxo